Anchor Days
The days that keep you grounded in the chaotic seasons of life.
22/10/2025.
Today was an āanchor day.ā
The type of day that keeps you grounded in the seasons of life that feel like a raging sea.
And yes, thatās exactly what this season has felt like.
I am in a season of transition, growth and pure chaos.
Transition because the kids are growing up and changing fast. One toddler is almost fully potty trained, while the other is entering into that stage. Along with potty training, thereās the fact that the kids are no longer napping during the day. After 3.5 years of mid-day breaks, the nap era is over. And that specific transition has drastically changed the rhythm of our days, and that change feels tumultuous as we are still very much in the adjustment phase.
Growth because, now that my children are more independent, I have started responding to more opportunities offered to me, and pursuing endeavors that have been on pause for the past few years. But lately the opportunities seem to have been piling on, and I feel like I have been stumbling under their weight.
And chaos. Chaos because of children who are undergoing big changes developmentally and routine-wise. Which means thereās lots of big feelings as well: crying, fighting, defying, resisting, interrupting, and so on.
Some days basic tasks feel impossible to accomplish.
Some days everyday routines like going potty, picking up toys, putting on shoes, and going to bed feel like endless battles.
Some days it feels like I canāt even take two steps forward before I have toddlers hanging onto to my legs, or I find myself tripping over scattered toys.
Some days keeping the house clean and tidy feels like playing āwhack-a-moleā. As soon as one mess is dealt with, another disaster erupts in a different corner of the house.
And thenā¦ thereās days like today. Anchor days.
Days where you must mark them down in your calendar (and write a Substack post about) because you need to remember that they exist. Days that reset your heart and mind, and keep you going. Days that you can hold onto as a reminder that itās all worth it.
Days like today: when the kids play calmly and quietly, alone and with each other, for hours. With only a few manageable squabbles and otherwise minimal intervention needed from me.
Days when I can cook a meal and wash wishes and water plants and not have tiny hands getting into things they are not supposed to, or ripping items out of my grasp.
Days when the kids actually eat the food I put in front of them and go on the potty without needing to be reminded and forced.
Days when I can actually do some yard work and the kids help or play nicely.
Days when bedtime lasts only a few, blissful moments, and the children are alseep before their little musical hedgehog ends its songs, and when it does, the room is still and quiet, but for the faint breathing of little sleeping souls.
Days when I can sit down after the kids are down, and still find it within myself to be creative and write.
Even as I write, I am tempted to over-analyze the day, pin-point what I did differently, and try to come up with a āperfect dayā formula. To have on demand the things that I suspect have contributed to the drastic change in attitude and atmosphere, so that I can hold onto them, and repeat them, over and over and over again, as to never have a bad day ever again.
But Iām trying really hard not to. Yes, some things might have worked today, but I canāt make them my anchor. Because what works today might not work tomorrow. Thatās just the reality of raising children. Because children are constantly changing, and that makes them unpredictable. Which means us parents need to be on our toes and ready to adapt to our kids transformations.
However, what I can make my anchor, is the day that has already passed. The events that have transpired and been embroidered into the tapestry of time.
Today can be my anchor. My reminder that not every day is blissful, but that there are goods days ahead, waiting to be lived.
Until next time,
- Jas
(Thanks for the term Danielle Jerace - You inspired an entire post āŗļø)
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Another enjoyable read. Anchor days are great, but I think the storms with toddlers can be easier to manage than the hurricanes of the teenage years. Unless of course your kids turn out like mine did and it will be smooth sailing all the way to adulthood. Either way life will continue to happen, and it is how we respond to the challenges that will define our overall journey.